Wandering Body Parts, Revisited

Felicity’s comment on my Wandering Wombs story reminded me of this family funny…

Last year Jeff and I went on the Atkins diet to shed a few extra pounds, and as a result Jeff got into the habit of munching on mixed nuts while watching TV. He buys them from the bulk foods section, so they’re in a flimsy plastic bag instead of a can or jar. (For a while I kept dumping them into an empty plastic jar that originally came with nuts in it, but Jeff kept throwing it away when he’d emptied it, and I’d have to rescue it from the trash. I must have missed seeing it in there the last time, because it disappeared.)

Those of you who know me in real life can attest to the fact that my housekeeping skills are less than optimal… so there’s usually other stuff on the couch — laundry waiting to be folded, or a blanket because I was cold watching TV, stacks of junk mail, newspapers, textbooks and half-finished homework, and of course the odd cat or two. Or three.

So anyway, one night we were sitting watching Law & Order. The room was pretty dark, just the light from the TV and the hallway. Jeff started fidgeting around, and I looked over at him to see what was up. He was feeling beside himself, between his legs, down in the cracks of the couch, looking under stuff, obviously looking for something, so I asked, “Whatcha looking for, Honey?” He looked up with this frustrated expression on his face, and answered “My NUTS!”

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